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Image by Shane Stagner

Kelpmore

High School

Pack of Fish

OUR VISION

KELPMORE HIGH SCHOOL will swim great lengths for our students. We are a school with the passion to propel fingerlings beyond the murky educational scope found elsewhere. Excelling in mathematics and science, we equip students with the tools needed for a flourishing life, a life bubbling with vast wonder and deep meaning. KELPMORE believes that a life swimming in mathematical and scientific know-how is a savory life indeed, one flavored with upscaled existence, flaying before each KELPMORE student numerous meaty months of fin-spinning adventure. Let's speak plainly and peel the goods to the bone; shall we? We've done the math, and the calculations are clear: KELPMORE students live longer and live better. Why? It's the math and science. 

STUDENT KNOW-HOW

At KELPMORE, young fish brains are stuffed with statistics, a mathematical course teaching fingerlings to calculate a risk before venturing into our watery world each day. In addition, Kelpmore students are trained to calculate percentages and determine measurements, enabling them to make critical decisions.

 

STUDENTS LEARN TO:

 

  • Compute the amount of food available at any given time—this informs a fish as to whether it is necessary to eat an extra helping or to "off" the competition

  • Determine the current pollution levels in a neighborhood before making a big move—a financial safeguard, thwarting the need to borrow sand dollars from a gritty loan shark

  • Eyeball accurate measurements, enabling students to plan family trips so that each day's swimming distance is known beforehand—an ability that allows a young parent to contract a "No Complaining" rule before traveling.

 

FURTHERMORE, aptitude in the area of measurement enables a fish to calculate the distance and time when jetting to safety should a tsunami be incoming. As our more poetic, pithy math professors often say:

 

"A math-poor fish is a soon-dead fish."

Couple those Kelpmore math skills with our top-quality, grade A science program and your young fish will someday be an adult swimming in success. 

Image by Caleb Kastein

When the ocean waters begin to rise and fishy homes face destruction, whom will our gilled government hire to increase the magnetic connection beneath home foundations?

A KELPMORE science-adept student,

that's who.

When temperatures rise to the point of blanch or boil, whom will the authority hire to invent an anti-heating device?

 

A KELPMORE science-smart student,

that's who. 

Image by Brian Yurasits

PARENTS

When you picture

your fingerling's future:

 

Think waves of know-how; think banks of sand dollars.

 

Think oodles of grandkids visiting you at the exclusive Ray's Resort.

Yes, tucked within the city's silken kelp forest is KELPMORE HIGH, the school that helps your child thrive, the school holding your ticket to more!

Ocean-Class

Electives

KELP KITCHEN 

Learn to make exquisite dishes with ingredients coming straight from our KELPMORE garden.

 

KELP QUILTING

Discover a patchwork of colorful art; thread your life with fun.

 

KELPTIC CARDS

Tap into the stars and learn to read the future!

 

KANOODLE CLUB

A social gathering wherein students learn to date safely. 

 

KEY-MAKING

Unlock your future when you make the key that unlocks banks and treasure chests.  

AND MORE!

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